i never knew...

i never knew that your absence could cause me so much pain...i never knew my faithless could cause you so much hurts... i never knew my life would stop if i say goodbye to you,my prince...i never knew your humor could make me cry so hard...and i never knew that i would write these thoughts at midnight...

Hearing your voice killed me. It brought back the memories I wished to erase from my mind. Remembering how you would hold me the whole day. Whispered in my ear that I was your world. That I was everything to you. That losing me would kill you. Oh! God! I want to erase all that! All your words were all lies. Lies that gave me hope. I thought we were going to last forever. Thought that you would hold me tight and never letting go. Thought that "I love you" meant something to you. NO! I was so freaking wrong. Stupid to trust you. An idiot to flow my heart. Happiness it never came. Just sadness and raining tears. I don't know why hearing your voice killed me once again. I know in my mind and heart that I don't love you anymore. That I don"t want you to call. That I don"t want anything with you. But why! Why!? Does it hurt hearing those words. Hearing your soft voice once again.

I fell in love with lavish lips That whisked the world away Sailing by on pretty lies That fooled me everyday Lust, it fueled, passion's fire Burning all I knew Sinful lips took everything Leaving nothing true Came upon a humble man Who looked me in the eye Seemed to hang on every word Whispered in reply Coaxed me out into the world Stood there by my side When his lips brushed my skin I watched our souls collide Moments I had come to hold As love, they could not be Here and now, in this kiss Real love has come to me

Laying in your arms your breathing in my ear, This might sound strange there's nothing else i rather hear Your arms tight around me im drifting off to sleep, And god forbid if you leave this memory ill always keep, You whisper that you love me and how you've never felt this way, i wish that time would stop so this moment would never go away It's odd how something so small could make you feel so whole, How one person's time could touch your heart and soul, So if your asking where i wanna go there's no place i rather be, Then wrapped up under your arms under the blankets, watching tv:)

If i could travel back in time i would make sure you were mine we would be as happy as can be us together you and me we would love each other till death do us part no matter what you'd have my heart we could battle all things and make anything come true if i could travel back in time i would make sure to look for you

I never thought that one day I'll wake up && everything would change but it happened. The next day, you didn't love me anymore.

I fell in love with lavish lips That whisked the world away Sailing by on pretty lies That fooled me everyday Lust, it fueled, passion's fire Burning all I knew Sinful lips took everything Leaving nothing true Came upon a humble man Who looked me in the eye Seemed to hang on every word Whispered in reply Coaxed me out into the world Stood there by my side When his lips brushed my skin I watched our souls collide Moments I had come to hold As love, they could not be Here and now, in this kiss Real love has come to me

I'm done playing this game with you, Done with this game that isn't fair. You've caused me so much pain, So why should i even care? Everything you said were nothing but lies, You were just messing with my head. All you ever wanted... was just a little fun in bed! I never ever used you. Nor has it crossed my mind. I'm tired of thinking you're the "Lucky One." cause truth is I'm the one that's hard to find! I take back everything i ever said, Nothing you said was true. I deserve someone a lot better, Not a pathetic liar like you! I just can't believe i let myself, fall for all your lies. I could've known you were, Just like the other guys. Never again will think of you, and the time when you were mine. I'm tired of this Bull****, Loving you was a waste of time!

Crescent coat that you wear Till death that you had swear Thickness that is not easily tear Caution and always prepared Promises we have declared Feelings that we had shared Extreme extend, to be a pair Secret bonds, publicly unaware The world has been unfair Judging with cold stares A true love that is rare Leaving only a messy affair Bloodsheds placed everywhere Leaving me hopeless and despair Nightmare couldn't even compare Crimson dust fills the air Wearing my star coat with six pockets I still hold on your heirloom locket Would you cover me up with a jacket And take me away to another planet?

my secret...

i heard your voice you called my name a single kiss could stop the rain... yeah...god i miss you...i wish you were here right now so you can hold me in your arms...i wish i could get lost under your kises...i wish you knew that this is my biggest secret that i am sharing with you at this moment...

you know...i love you..!

for you...

may i tell you something?...i miss something...can you guess what?i miss: -your brown eyes that make me melt when they stare at me... -your lips that make me wish to kiss you like it's our last one... -your hands that make me feel safer than everything in the world... -your voice that brings the sun in my life even if out side is rainy... -your smile that makes me forget about the bad people around me... -your body that makes me feel the luckiest girl on this planet... and after writing all this stuff i realise that you're my brown eyed angel in disguise!

freedom...

you know...i realised that i forgot you....i don;t need you anymore so you can do whatever you want with your life... but anyway....what hurts the most was being so close and having so much to say and watching you walk away

18.01.2009

remember the times i helped you to go through the bad times...and now you are laughing at me ???

i'm staring on a tree outside and i remember you...i remember your eyes...i remember the times we've been through...it's sad,isn't it?i gave you everything:i gave you my heart,i gave you my trust...and now i have nothing at all...is this what you wanted?...i don't think so...

you're bad...you weren't like that...what happened to you?you really don't care about me anymore???...do you remember when you sad that nobody believed in you and i was there?...i look back and i realise that you don't deserve my friendship...you don't deserve even my patience...you'll be sorry one time when you'll see that your new friends will betray you...

love hurts...i've been thinking and i realised that i don't know why do we love?do we need pain?...do we need tears?...i guess we need to share our pain with the other one so we can feel safe...but...is it true that we can love only once in life?...i have to think about that...